natsume's true feelings
by mikanatsume4ever
Summary: natsume has feelings for someone and so does tsubasa. but natsume despises him. why lets find out. NxM
1. Chapter 1

**Natsume's true feelings**

**Hey guys, I am a new writer in fan fiction. I don't know how my stories will come out ,so please send me reviews. I will be waiting for them. Now go on and read my story. I hope u enjoy it.**

**NATSUME-16 years**

**MIKAN-15 years**

**Ch 1 Sakura feelings**

The Sakura Tree- The tree which was more like the only soul companion of Natsume in front of whom, he was just a young boy unlike the other children of his age in front of whom he was 'THE NATSUME' . To this tree who Natsume called Sakura, he shared every emotion of his, spending most of his time either on the ground or on the branch always with a manga, never meant to be read ,on to show, so that he would not be called a maniac tree lover, tree talker or dreamer. Natsume made sure that he showed none of these qualities, but that didn't mean he never dreamt, never talked to the only thing that always listened carefully. No, he was just like one of us. INSIDE..

And today also Natsume was just lying on the branch of Sakura looking at the Sakura petals float and glide in the soft spring wind. His beautiful crimson eyes softened only for that once, thinking about the terrible mission he went on the last day, the bullet wounds he got and his sure luck of survival, but then he realized that he did not survive because he was lucky, he survived because his heart wanted to see the beautiful smile of the cheerful annoying baka whom he had grown to love more than anything else over the last 6 years. He knew very well that it was her melting smile that gave him a direction to live , her smile was like a small lamp lit between the pitch blackness of his heart , lightening his world. He knew that he would die if she was gone. He wanted to hold her, tell her how much he loved, how much he wanted her, how much he needed her but he knew he was too much of a coward to do so. He was not afraid of any weapon, nor anyone , but one thing that scared the creeps out of him was that thought of her rejection. He knew that he could not take that.

So, he decided to let the things be as they were, he was till now happy enough with the attention he got from her by teasing her to bits, plus it was always fun to watch her underwear- he never complained.

**So ,how was my first chapter. I hope you liked it. Please review. Thank-you**


	2. Chapter 2

**Tsubasa loves M****ikan**

After what would have seemed like hours to some one watching Natsume and minutes to Natsume, he was broken from the long chain of his pondering thought by a musical laughter of a girl. A laugh he recognized in a jiffy because it was there ringing in his subconscious mind, heart and whole body. He looked down to see his cheerful brunette running around like a 5 year old girl and laughing. He smiled- Yes, for a second only. He knew that this was the only sight that would make him smile. The only one.

But soon his smile changed to a well formed scowl after he saw that his love of life (cheery) was laughing because she was being chased by the shadow freak- Tsubasa- the guy Natsume hated with every ounce of fire in him because he knew how friendly he and Mikan were. Maybe he was jealous.

He wanted to jump down from his branch that instant and burn the shadow freak to crisps and came near jumping, stopping himself in mid-air, when tsubasa caught up with Mikan and picked her up from behind swinging her, wasn't natsume the only one who had that right.

He knew that he was capable of killing any guy who came near mikan, but he never lost his temper with tsubasa because he always saw mikan smile brightest when she was with him and even though natsume knew that seeing her with tsubasa was too much to bear for him, he could also never give up on that smile.

So, he commanded himself to go back to his seat and sit quietly though anyone could swear he never wavered his sight from mikan for even a second and listen to everything they said most intently. His training was finally paying off.

He saw tsubasa sit under natsume's Sakura tree with mikan on his lap who was completely oblivious to the fact that they looked like a couple then, which was something did not very much like. But then he also knew that was too naïve and dense to sense that anyway.

What he did not like was that tsubasa was not dense and he was looking at mikan in a very unscrutiable manner. Natsume had a hunch on what was coming and this was something he internally feared the second most.

"mikan! What do you think about me" – natsume heard tsubasa say and leaned forward to hear mikan with uneasiness and anxiety.

"you are great tsubasa" –he heard mikan chant and slightly twitched.

"I know but what do you feel for me"-now natsume was angry and for two reasons, firstly, another guy was confessing his love to his light and secondly it pissed him off how he could say it so easily while he, even after six years could not utter a single word.

"I love you tsubasa"-mikan said excitedly.

Natsume 's world crashed as he heard those words, he wanted to burn the whole school with himself that moment. Tears of helplessness and loss flowed down his smooth cheek.

End of chapter 2

Hope you liked it..Please review.. i need them


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys! I hope you liked my story so far.. If you did please review.. Thank-you !!

Whom does Mikan likes

"You are my favourite Brother" Mikan added genuinely smiling. Natsume wanted to die- Wait what!! "You are my favourite brother"- these worlds repeated themselves in his brain until he was completely sure that this was what he heard.

While Tsubasa's world drowned-

"What! But Mikan I love you so much. I want us to be together, not as brother and sister but like boyfriend and girlfriend." Tsubasa cried and tried desperately.

Natsume watched this with only one ray of hope that seemed to be drowning in the sea with the sun at the horizon.

Mikan got down from Tsubasa's lap and slowly sat down beside him. "Tsubasa!" she said in the most soothing voice, Voice that could make men drool on spot.

"I am sorry. I really love you but only as my best sempai. I am sorry I am so un grateful, but you see, I love someone else. " She said almost teary. Natsume swore he would kill Tsubasa for making Mikan cry for one thing that made his blood boil was seeing Mikan cry. Natsume got another shove when he comprehended that Mikan loved someone else. He quickly tried to figure out who. His only ray of hope was seriously drowning. "Ruka is a gentleman, soft. Mikan must like him, but even Yuu is there who always helped her,". What have I done for her to love me. Teased and embarrassed her" he quietly thought to himself, genuinely crying.

"Its ok mikan, I can handle it. I'm Tsubasa right. So tell me who is this lucky guy who stole you away from me" said Tsubasa trying to be more cheerful and Natsume's heart just ran and sweat prickled down his cheek as he waited for her reply, somewhere in his heart was a feeling of losing him forever, he could feel his light fading away.

"Tsubasa, stop it, well you know, I guess I can tell you. Its really stupid, he teases me, pisses me off, always peeks on my underwear and embarrass me in front of everyone but he has also been there always when I needed him, he has always helped me quietly, though I really feel he hates me" cried Mikan helplessly..

Tsubasa pitied this little girl.

"Natsume, isn't it," he whispered, enough only for Mikan to hear. She nodded.

"I am sure he does not hate you" She shakes her head.

"Tell him before someone else take away his heart. You might later regret for not telling him."

She did not say anything..

"good bye. See you later"

With this he left her and went away.

So how was this one.. I hope nice. Please review

Thank-you

O3o2q.ash

akerue


	4. Chapter 4

**I hope you liked it. please review.and enjoy further..**

**We love each other**

* * *

Natsume, all this while, was trying to figure out what just happened." Someone who teases her, embarrassed her, peeks on her panties, shows that he hates her yet always ends up helping her" he repeated to himself again and again and then for the first time in his life his heart leapt from joy, real, genuine, true joy. Mikan loved him.

He made up his mind. He knew it was now or never.

He sled down the tree in front of Mikan. Mikan was startled to see him, she looked up. He could see signs of tears in her chocolate orbs.

"You were up there the whole time" she asked trembling.

He simply nodded.

"You heard and saw everything", she knew she had made a perfect fool of herself.She knew that Natsume hated her, he could never like a baka, dense and immature girl like her.

He nodded again , his eyes never leaving her eyes.

Mikan stood up slowly. She knew she had to run because Natsume was going to kill her for saying all that. Natsume got up to.

Mikan was about to run, run past Natsume when he caught her wrist.

"mikan"- he said in a voice which was completely alien to Mikan.

She was speechless and motionless.

Natsume pulled her towards him and pinned her to the tree rapping her with his arms.

"Mikan" he said again, his eyes gazing intently into the chocolate orbs.

He then got his face nearer to her and collided his lips to hers with all the passion.

Mikan was too astounded by his actions, to do anything.

"Thankyou Mikan" he said in a raw voice as he broke his kiss, and after saying proceeded to kiss again.

"I love you so much. I loved you for so long. I was coward. I could not tell you due to my fear of rejection.

I want you mikan, I need you. I love you Mikan sakura. Oh! so much" and after saying this he proceeded to kiss her again his hands, slowly sliding to her waist from her cheeks as he felt Mikan's hand wrap around his nape. Mikan was not resisting the kiss. She was kissing him back listening to all those words from Natsume's mouth which was overwhelming for her.She would stop dead only to hear him say 'Mikan' and here , he said he loved her, her dream was coming true, her heart leaping from the greatest joy. As for Natsume, he could feel this light coming back to him.

He promised to protect her, be there for her, love her for she had brightened his dark life.

"I love you too Natsume" Mikan said slowly , after her long kiss. Natsume picked her up bridal style and walked towards his room.

"Where are we going Natsume" she asked innocently.

"My room" he replied enchanted.

"Oh" was the only thing she said.

Natsume had got Mikan. Now Mikan was his. He had gotten the light that he always wished for, he was happy, his eyes were happy.

He silently thanked the gods as he looked down to see the angel in his arms and smiled.

"oh! natsume, you smiled could you do it again" She requested exitedly making Natsume blush and flush..

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**The end**

**Thank you**

**please review  
**


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